What your camp coffee choice says about you.
No one knows more than Uncle Biv how critical a big steaming cup o’ joe is first thing in the morning. Pair it with a sunrise, the smell of fresh air, and maybe the sound of sizzling bacon and eggs and you have the recipe for the perfect morning. What you you may not know, is that your choice of coffee making device says a lot about you as a camper. Why? Because coffee is sacred (Uncle Biv’s 3rd Rule). How we go about fixin’ it up for ourselves says a lot about what we prioritize, and what we’re willing to risk, to acquire that golden cup of hot bean water. Let’s dive in.
Instant Coffee
Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Instant coffee is for the dregs of society and worse - ultra-zealous ultralight backpackers and the kind of people who take every short cut they can find. Will I drink it? In a pinch. Do I recommend it? Absolutely not. Coffee and camping come together to form a ritual that shouldn’t be devolved into ripping open a single serving pouch and pouring it in hot water. If you pour it into cold, or even worse pack it into your lips like a wad o’ chew, get out. And don’t come back, you hear!
percolators
You believe in sharing, your favorite book is Lonesome Dove, and your favorite movie involves cowboys, justice, and a sweet shot of Monument Valley. The percolator is classic and designed to be a crowd pleaser. The gentle burble and pop of percolating coffee fill the air of your campsite as you heat it on a special hook over the fire, your personal wood fired stove you nicknamed “maybelle”, or perhaps a classic two burner stove. Your friends stumble from their tents to find you dressed, fire made, coffee brewing, and breakfast started. You’re a morning legend, and you know it.
french press
You went with the easiest and most convenient offering at the camping store, and you won’t look back twice. It took a couple of tries to get it perfect but now you have a reliable and repeatable method of extracting caffeine in the woods and there’s nothing wrong with that. Are you boring? Maybe. But do people complain when you have coffee ready for them every morning? Not at all. You’re the reliable SUV of the camping world, and that’s exactly who you want to be.
aero-press
You have standards when it comes to making coffee, so you eschewed the appeal of instant. However, you still wanted a system that was light, portable, and easy to operate while making a quality cup everytime. You saw a video on the Aero-press and got hooked. Now you make you and your friends aeropress coffees every trip. Sure it takes an hour to make six coffees out of a gadget designed to make them one at a time, and they’re a little cold because plastic isn’t a good insulator, but you love the hidden complexity of your giant coffee syringe. You’ve even broken it out at home and made cups there because it’s more “convenient” to make a single serve with the aeropress despite the fact you own a coffee pod machine. You’re a nerd. That’s ok.
pour over
Ah, the hipsters of the coffee world. You bring that weird little kettle with you, pop out a silicon pourover, and get to work. “Now this is light”, you sneer at the aero-press guy. “At least have some class!” You exclaim at the instant coffee aficionados. Your coffee is hand ground in your personal portable grinder, and you know not only what country, but what valley and farm it comes from. You personally had the beans roasted by your buddy, “Moonbear”, at the coffee collective in the nearest major urban center or cutesy tourist town. You do a lot of work, but your coffee tastes about the same as the aero-press, except weaker. At least you look like an alchemist when you make it.
drip
Bob drove his 5th wheel pull behind travel trailer to the lake where he keeps his boat and serves as campground host. He wakes up in the morning while the Mrs. is asleep and starts the drip coffee maker while he opens the window and enjoys the sunrise and the bird song. Soon enough, he’s got a hot and convenient mug of joe and he’s wandering down to the bait shop to let people know what’s biting today, or headed over to the heads to make sure they’re spic and span before “rush hour” (Bob’s puns are always intended). Be like Bob.
not coffee
I don’t know how you do it. Are you superhuman? Or an alien? You don’t drink coffee in the morning. It’s amazing. Stop rubbing it in my face. Honestly, you’re missing out on one of the best parts of camping. At least have a hot tea and soak up the sunrise with me.
Got a coffee setup your proud of? Want to fit me over instant coffee or pour-over? Want to share the story about the best, or worst, cup of coffee you ever had camping? Send it in to Uncle Biv’s Big Blog. Best stories might end up in the newsletter. Worst ones definitely will.
Have a question about camping you need answered? Ask Uncle Biv.